I thought it was a fluke at first, but then I started paying attention. I have acquired a super power of sorts, and it mysteriously happened at Target (twice), Costco, and Home Depot too. I apparently have the uncanny power to repel hundred dollar bills. They literally fly out of my wallet and into various retail sites! I have several friends with this same affliction and none of us can understand how we can walk into a store with a list that only has 3 items, including shampoo, dog food and a pair of pantyhose, and walk out missing a hundred bucks every time.
Don’t tell me I need to budget better or make a list and stick to it. I am no newbie at this game folks. In fact, I have actually become one of those annoying people who clog the aisles (at least I park on the side instead of the middle) while I sort for the 2 for 1 coupon as I work up a bead of sweat and a permanent worry line on my forehead comparing prices among brands. I am now the person I always wanted to ram with my cart, but that doesn’t explain the phenomena of the money repellent. And then it hit me.
School is out and the kids have been coming with me on these trips. Oh the pieces are all coming together now! The three item list morphs into Bugles and Otter Pops and Pizza, oh my! I am constantly worn down by the whining for new bathing suits and the tag teaming for beach towels, and figure it is some type of bloodless torture thought up by teenagers to turn their mothers into mindless,debit card wielding blobs. I for one, will no longer be drinking the kool aid and the kids will not be joining me on anymore shopping adventures until I can find my zen and keep those little buggers out of my head! I found a great therapist to help me do this and when I called for an appointment, she told me she only takes cash and it’s a hundred dollars per session. Damn.
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